June 07, 2009

The Case of The Overspending Husband

Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury:

The Defendant is charged today with violating several crimes against his family's best financial interest. In violation of Jonesie Family Statutes, Chapter 13, Sections 101.1 through 103.5, Defendant made unnecessary purchases and overspent on those few purchases that may have been necessary. Rather than buy the most cost effective items, Defendant bought the most expensive items available.

The facts of this case are simple. Defendant, pictured here below, is in charge of all lawn care services for the Jonesie property. Realizing that he is talented in this area, Defendant made a proposal to his father. Defendant would provide lawn care services for his father's property, and would do so at a much more competitive price than what his father was currently paying. Defendant's father took him up on this offer.

Ladies and gentlemen, it's important to take a side bar here so that the State can get one thing clear. The State has no problem with Defendant's attempt to make more money for his family. In fact, the State fully supports this idea and realizes that in today's economy a Husband may have to get a little creative in order to provide for his family.

However, the Defendant did more than get creative. Defendant took this as an opportunity to go to Home Depot and spend recklessly and unnecessarily. Defendant purchased lawn care equipment that he has been doing without for years. Additionally, and to the State's bewilderment, Defendant purchased more luxurious items for tools that he already has.

Just a few of these items are pictured here, in Exhibit "A."

Exhibit A: Just a few of the items in Defendant's garage that he already has. Note that the two items marked with the yellow arrows are actually two tools that do the exact same thing.

In Exhibit B, you see Defendant with a backpack of some sort that blows away yard debris. Defendant already has such an item. Granted the other item did not go on his back, however, Defendant was perfectly fine holding the item before.

For those items that Defendant did need, like a hat and sunglasses, Defendant purchased the most expensive options.

Exhibit C- Defendant caught in the act, wearing expensive hat and glasses. Note the smile on Defendant's face, he is clearly enjoying all of his new toys.

Exhibit D- A passerby admires Defendant's fancy equipment.

The evidence is clear, Defendant is an over spender, purchases recklessly, and purchases unnecessarily. Rather than capitalize on his creativity, Defendant has eaten away at all of his profit and the family's extra income.

The State rests its case.

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Jennifer said...

Guilty as charged! LOL! What are you going to do with all the duplicate equipment? Sell it on eBay? Or do you think he'll try and keep them - 'coz you never know when you'll need to use both at the same time? Great post! :-)

ModernMom said...

LOL This is so cute..and so true. I would also vogte guilty! Can I add my hubby and perhaps turn this into some kind of class action suit? I need some additional items added...new shovel..old one wasn't um shovely enough? New Wheelbarrow, last one was too small?

Love your blog!

Smiling Mama said...

This is great! I swear, my husband comes up with projects around the house based only on the fact that they would require a new tool. Of chouse, I only find that out after I've totally bought into the the project.

Common conversation: "But you already have a drill (insert other tool here)."

"No, that's a X drill. This is a Y drill. Totally different."


ani said...

that passerby is just too cute! LOL!

Justice Jonesie said...

What is with these husbands? Sounds like we need to um, upgrade our closets and get um, new shoes while we are at it. LOL

Justice Fergie said...

SO funny! and SO true! want to hear another joke?

i showed this post to my hubby and he was like: "actually, there ARE situations where you need 2 of that kind of tool, blah blah blah..."

they're hopeless!

So yes, when I buy another pair of "black shoes" I better not hear anything!!

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