January 24, 2007

Where will I find the time for myself?

I started writing this post last night, but then fell right asleep. I am thoroughly exhausted. My day starts at 7:00 and I'm at work by 8:30 and I go, go, go until at least 5:30. Rush home in traffic and I'm at home by 6:00....as soon as I walk in the door, DD is there to greet me and then it's play, dinner, bath, bed...it all ends at about 9:00 and then I'm usually out by 9:30. The weekends are no better because there always seems to be a family event to take care of. When, oh when, will I have time to take care of me?????? I've been meaning to go to Victoria's Secret Semi-annual sale for the past three weeks, I need a pedicure, and let's not talk about my hair....which has been in a ponytail for the past three weeks (and more). I just don't understand where I'm supposed to find the time to get things done for myself. What are you ladies doing? I need a Work for Me Wednesday tip!


Justice Fergie said...

LOL. This post made me laugh. Although I'm almost sure you don't think it's funny! Hee hee.

Welcome to "Working Mommy World!" So, I have 2 pieces of advice:

(1) At the risk of being brutally honest, I will say this: It's not about you anymore! You have so many responsibilities now with a child, husband, home and work that something has to give in order for you to stay sane and for the most part, taking care of "me" is the thing that is sacrificed. I'm not saying that you have to walk around exhausted, looking a mess and miserable, but you have to put things that "would be nice to do" on the back burner until you get the other parts of your life taken care of. The Victoria's Secret Semi-Annual Sale? LOL. That's hilarious to me because I can't remember the last time I went in that store. Or shopping for myself. It would not even be on my radar to make it to that sale because I know I just don't have the time or that it's not a priority.

Which leads me to my second piece of advice:

(2) Prioritize and Organize. I know people clown me for being organized, but really it's the only way to make it through my life without losing my mind. So, here's what you do: Make a list of each aspect of your life and what needs to be done (i.e. Home, LadyDay, Work, You) and plan out your weeks. Laugh if you want to, but my weeks are planned out weeks ahead of time. Get a great calendar (I like the MomAgenda or the Polestar Family Calendar - $10 on Amazon) and schedule away. It can be general stuff, like "Clean Bathrooms on Saturday", "Grocery Shop on Sunday" “Go to Babies R Us for new sippy cups and socks on Sunday” – whatever.

You also have to get a good schedule going. Try waking up at 6am and doing one or two extra things around the house -- you'll get used to it and you won't feel so rushed. Then, in the evenings, make sure you take 30 minutes to prepare for the next day (pick out your clothes, pack your lunch, whatever). Sit down with hubby to work out a bath and bed schedule for LadyDay (you can alternate nights or split up the duties each night). Maybe he bathes her while you prepare dinner or vice-versa. It will take a while but once you come up with a system it will make things easier. Dinner is a constant pain in my you-know-what. Try joining in Menu Plan Mondays!

As for time for yourself. You have to make time. It’s tough. I generally make my Friday “off-days” my “me days.” I get my hair done, run personal errands and whatever else I need/want to do. Also, girltime is important to me so hubby knows that once a month I go to my Moms Only events with Mocha Moms. I tell him at least a week in advance (both in person and via email so there’s no miscommunication!) and those are my special times. I know you just started your job but ask around to other women/moms and see what kind of flex schedule, if any, you can take advantage of. Or, you and hubby agree that every other Saturday morning is “Mommy Time.” And you can get your hair done, go to Victoria’s Secret, get a pedicure or what have you. But unless you like actually going in the store, order that stuff online and use that time for something else girl! The Internet is a working mom’s best friend  To that end, visit www.mommytrackd.com (or click the button on the left-hand side of our blog) they have great tips for working mommies.

Sorry for the long and frenetic nature of this comment but I hope this helps. And don’t get me wrong, it’s going to be hard and you’re going to be tired and you’re going to have meltdowns, but hang in there and know that you’re not alone! Supermoms Unite!

Justice Jones said...

I'm in your boat J. Ny. I don't even have time to post this comment because there are a million things I have to do. So I'll be really brief. My only answer is that sleep is a luxary, not a necessity. I get laundry done, pack lunch, and prepare for class while everyone is asleep. It's crazy but, what else to do? Never see my kids? That's not an option. I need 36 hours to have a decent productive day.

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