May 03, 2007

I'm Your Pusher-Mom

Ok y'all. I've joked about it before, but now it's getting serious [sorta]. I really think that Oldest is addicted to fruit snacks. Besides the fact that when she's at home she must have a packet of fruit snacks IN!HER!VIEW!AT!ALL!TIMES! and when I open a packet for her she starts jumping up and down with big eyes and squeals of joy -- Let's take a look at some common signs and symptoms of addiction, shall we:



  • Inability to relax or have fun without having fruit snacks. Yup.


  • Sudden changes in work or school attendance and quality of work or grades. Yup. Craft time just cannot be enjoyed without having immediately ingested or anticipating the ingestion of fruit snacks.


  • Angry outbursts, mood swings, irritability, manic behavior, or overall attitude change. Yup. [Oh wait, she's 2]


  • Talking incoherently or making inappropriate remarks. Yup. [Oh wait, she's 2]


  • Deterioration of physical appearance and grooming. By the end of the day? Certainly. [Oh wait, she's 2]


  • Wearing sunglasses and/or long sleeve shirts Zoe winter vests frequently or at inappropriate times. Yup. [Oh wait, she's 2]


  • No longer spending time with friends who don't eat fruit snacks and/or associating with known fruit snack abusers. Hmm, I have noticed that she doesn't really pay her little sis much mind. [Oh wait, she's 2]


  • Engaging in secretive or suspicious behaviors, such as making frequent trips to the restroom, basement, or other isolated areas where fruit snack consumption would be undisturbed. Yup. Hubby and I have come across her trying to hide in her room or under the dining room table with the box of contraband snacks.


  • Eating fruit snacks first thing in the morning. Yup.


  • Talking about fruit snacks all the time and pressuring others to indulge. Yup. Heaven help me.

So, you see it's not entirely a figment of my imagination. And I realize I am to blame since I'm the one who keeps buying them, but I refuse to continue to be her enabler. Starting tomorrow the Fergie household is going on a Fruit Snack Detox! Ok, maybe not tomorrow, but definitely on Monday. I'm just a teensy bit afraid to feel her toddler wrath.


7 comments:

Anonymous said...

I.AM.DYING.LAUGHING!!!
Auntie Fe

Justice Jones said...

This was too cute. And the picture took the cake, or should I say fruit snacks (ha!).

Justice Ny said...

Just hilarious!!!! Is she eating anything else...or is it only fruit snacks?

Big Mama said...

Just remember, the only thing worse than toddler fruit snack addiction is toddler wrath.

May God have mercy on you.

Tracey R. said...

Too funny!!

I don't let my kids eat fruit snacks. Mainly because addictive behavior runs in my family, and I can easily see it leading down the wrong path... fruit snacks today, fruit roll-ups tomorrow, gummy bears soaked in vodka 10 years from now (oh, college flashback to intoxicated goodness...)

Fruit snacks. They're the gateway snack.

jazzmoh said...

She needs an intervention!

Justice Fergie said...

Ny - she eats other stuff, but only as an obstacle to get to the fruit snacks.

Big Mama - thank you for your prayers :)

Tracey R. - "the gateway snack" had me cracking up. Oh and the vodka-soaked gummi bears? sounds very yum! Just where did you go to college, missy?

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