January 10, 2007

I feel guilty about having some freedom


Well ladies....I've been back to work now for a week, after spending the last year and change at home with DD. It's been very hectic here because I was thrown into the dungeons immediately. I, however, feel this tremendous sense of freedom being out of the house. Of course I miss her dearly, but I can't explain how liberating this past week has been. I know as time goes by I'll start missing her more as I spend more hours away from her, but I feel really good right now, but I feel guilty at the same time. Am I a terrible mom?

3 comments:

Revka said...

No, you're not a bad mom. Being a stay-at-home mother is so much more work than many people realize. There are many, many days when I would love to escape - the children, the responsibility, the housework. It's normal to feel that way. Let's face it, working at a "job" is often more exciting than the repetitious and oft-unrewarded work we do at home.

Justice Fergie said...

hey there!

i totally understand how you feel. and no, you're not a bad mother at all -- only human. i went through precisely the same thing when i returned to work from maternity leave after both babies. it's sad to say, but i get the majority of my household stuff done at work! scheduling doctor's appointments, planning dinner menus, checking email, buying birthday party gifts during my lunch hour, etc. Not to mention going to my exercise classes during lunch and even blogging! i would never find the time to do all these things at home with an infant and a toddler hanging onto my legs 24/7. even the little things like walking to Au Bon Pain for lunch or listening to the radio in the car, taking an afternoon Starbucks break and even just putting on professional clothes everyday makes a difference for your sanity. so, i say all that to say that what you're feeling is perfectly normal. you are right, however, that the novelty of the "outside world" will wear off soon enough and you'll be back to wishing a rugrat was hanging onto your leg, (which is why i think a part-time gig would be perfect) but until then, freedom rings my friend!

Justice Jones said...

I totally understand how you feel but you should not feel guilty. I concur with the other comments and would like to add that I am sure that the time you do have with DD, once you get home, is used adequatly so you should not feel bad. Meaning, you spend quality time with her and maximize that time to the fullest. You are doing your best. And yes, part-time is great if you can really do a part-time gig. In most legal professions that is not entirely possible, especially if you practice some sort of litigation.

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