I'm Your Pusher-Mom

Ok y'all. I've joked about it before, but now it's getting serious [sorta]. I really think that Oldest is addicted to fruit snacks. Besides the fact that when she's at home she must have a packet of fruit snacks IN!HER!VIEW!AT!ALL!TIMES! and when I open a packet for her she starts jumping up and down with big eyes and squeals of joy -- Let's take a look at some common signs and symptoms of addiction, shall we:

• Inability to relax or have fun without having fruit snacks. Yup.
  



• Sudden changes in work or school attendance and quality of work or grades. Yup. Craft time just cannot be enjoyed without having immediately ingested or anticipating the ingestion of fruit snacks.
  



• Angry outbursts, mood swings, irritability, manic behavior, or overall attitude change. Yup. [Oh wait, she's 2]
  



• Talking incoherently or making inappropriate remarks. Yup. [Oh wait, she's 2]
  



• Deterioration of physical appearance and grooming. By the end of the day? Certainly. [Oh wait, she's 2]
  
  


• Wearing sunglasses and/or long sleeve shirts Zoe winter vests frequently or at inappropriate times. Yup. [Oh wait, she's 2]
  



• No longer spending time with friends who don't eat fruit snacks and/or associating with known fruit snack abusers. Hmm, I have noticed that she doesn't really pay her little sis much mind. [Oh wait, she's 2]
  



• Engaging in secretive or suspicious behaviors, such as making frequent trips to the restroom, basement, or other isolated areas where fruit snack consumption would be undisturbed. Yup. Hubby and I have come across her trying to hide in her room or under the dining room table with the box of contraband snacks.
  



• Eating fruit snacks first thing in the morning. Yup.
  



• Talking about fruit snacks all the time and pressuring others to indulge. Yup. Heaven help me.
  

So, you see it's not entirely a figment of my imagination. And I realize I am to blame since I'm the one who keeps buying them, but I refuse to continue to be her enabler. Starting tomorrow the Fergie household is going on a Fruit Snack Detox! Ok, maybe not tomorrow, but definitely on Monday. I'm just a teensy bit afraid to feel her toddler wrath.